I watched this film over the weekend and after it was done, I went to rate it and got stuck between "Didn't like it" and "Liked it".
I still have no idea which one to go with.
V/H/S is...well, the summary will tell you that it's about a group of guys who break into a man's house to steal a specific video tape. However, that's NOT what the movie is about.
In reality, it's a series of short "found footage" films. Six in total with the break in story tying them all together.
My first problem is the break in story, Tape 56, was not a good tie in film. The movie keeps cutting back to it, but it doesn't work very well, plus it's insanely predictable. You'll know what's going to happen almost immediately, and it's the director's fault because he telegraphs it.
Amateur Night was ok, but only because the girl is awesome. Seriously, her performance is the best thing about V/H/S. Still, there's a very alpha male moment in the film that I think spoke volumes about the writer. He has the alpha male of the group make a decision based on strong morals, and then immediately do something completely immoral. It made no sense.
2nd Honeymoon is the most out of place film as it has no supernatural elements. (Oops, that's kind of a spoiler...) It's actually kind of boring that eventually ends with a very grizzly, and imho cowardly, visual. They drag the story out too long, and honestly, it makes zero sense when you examine it. It's also set in the same hotel as Amateur Night.
Glitchman is apparently someone's homage to Friday the 13th (pay attention to all the clues). It's not amazing, and the lead's acting is bullshit to try and throw the audience, but it entertained me, and seemed better timed than the previous films.
Strange Thing that Happened to Emily was really good until the ending. Seriously, this one had me on the edge of my seat. Amazingly done up until you find out what the twist is, and then it falls apart. Still, there are some concepts here that are very interesting that I'd like to see other filmmakers take farther.
Haunted House was meh. You'll really have to strain your brain to keep it from screaming at all the stupidity that goes on in this one. Let me give you a spoiler to point out the ignorance: Four guys head to a costume party and explore a house they think is the party house despite the fact that nobody is around. What kind of wild party were they headed to?
Overall, it's an intriguing movie. There are some solid concepts that I want to see fleshed out farther.
The really big problems are that all the stories try to be too cute, and you get absolutely zero back story or explanations meaning no connection to the characters. Oh, and if you have motion sickness, take some Dramamine before you watch...
V/H/S - Yay Netflix!
Ok, watched it.
The early one with the demon girl.... my fave. She was spooky from the first moment you see her in the background looking with those wide eyes toward the camera. <span style='font-size:8pt;line-height:100%'>i like you</span> Also, I would do her even knowing she was a demon because she was hot in some sort of evil, animal way.
Most important thing to know about this movie is: boobies, from beginning to end. Some are horror boobies or gore boobies, but some are nice boobies and hey, boobies.
The early one with the demon girl.... my fave. She was spooky from the first moment you see her in the background looking with those wide eyes toward the camera. <span style='font-size:8pt;line-height:100%'>i like you</span> Also, I would do her even knowing she was a demon because she was hot in some sort of evil, animal way.
Most important thing to know about this movie is: boobies, from beginning to end. Some are horror boobies or gore boobies, but some are nice boobies and hey, boobies.
"Be bold, and mighty forces will come to your aid."
Most important thing to know about this movie is: boobies, from beginning to end. Some are horror boobies or gore boobies, but some are nice boobies and hey, boobies.
Really? Aside from her, I can't remember any boobs.
“Activism is a way for useless people to feel important, even if the consequences of their activism are counterproductive for those they claim to be helping and damaging to the fabric of society as a whole.” - Dr Thomas Sowell
I guess there are boobies.
Maybe the movie is better than I give it credit for since I wasn't thinking about the boobies?
Maybe the movie is better than I give it credit for since I wasn't thinking about the boobies?
“Activism is a way for useless people to feel important, even if the consequences of their activism are counterproductive for those they claim to be helping and damaging to the fabric of society as a whole.” - Dr Thomas Sowell
One thing I can say..... this is one of those movies where a lot of people get killed, but they are such annoying people that you are glad when they get killed. Especially those "bros" in the chick demon one. And the peeps who were looking to steal the video tape.
"Be bold, and mighty forces will come to your aid."
Since this is an anthology series, I'll review it that way:
Amateur Night
Second best of the group, mainly because the brunette chick looks exceedingly creepy.
Second Honeymoon
Second worst of the group. The payoff wasn't that great, they repeat a pathetic attempt at suspense five minutes after they initially use it.
Tuesday the 17th
The best, even with the substandard acting from the female lead. The concept is fucking hilarious. I could write an entire movie based on a couple premises from this short.
The Sick Thing That Happened to Emily When She Was Younger
What the fuck? Shitty, shitty, shitty. Tenth generation X-Files. Made little to no sense, didn't fit in with the rest.
10/31/98
A middling effort. Even in '98, I had a cell phone and knew how to follow directions to a party. Stupid because the main characters have a switch that flips from "intelligent and cowardly" to "idiotic and courageous."
Tape 56
While it's crap by itself, as the thing which ties the other shorts together, it's respectable.
Amateur Night
Second best of the group, mainly because the brunette chick looks exceedingly creepy.
Second Honeymoon
Second worst of the group. The payoff wasn't that great, they repeat a pathetic attempt at suspense five minutes after they initially use it.
Tuesday the 17th
The best, even with the substandard acting from the female lead. The concept is fucking hilarious. I could write an entire movie based on a couple premises from this short.
The Sick Thing That Happened to Emily When She Was Younger
What the fuck? Shitty, shitty, shitty. Tenth generation X-Files. Made little to no sense, didn't fit in with the rest.
10/31/98
A middling effort. Even in '98, I had a cell phone and knew how to follow directions to a party. Stupid because the main characters have a switch that flips from "intelligent and cowardly" to "idiotic and courageous."
Tape 56
While it's crap by itself, as the thing which ties the other shorts together, it's respectable.
Diogenes of Sinope: "It is not that I am mad, it is only that my head is different from yours."
Arnold Judas Rimmer, BSC, SSC: "Better dead than smeg."
Arnold Judas Rimmer, BSC, SSC: "Better dead than smeg."