Words that indicate the speaker is a douche.

Post by **GORDON** » Tue Jul 20, 2010 2:03 pm

Been noticing a few key words and phrases lately used when someone is trying hard to be a douche.

Word: "Narrative."

Usage: "The Tea Party narrative is that the Arizona anti-Mexican laws are about order, not racism."

Reason the user is a douche: The person who uses "narrative" in that sense imply that the group with whom they disagree doesn't have a valid point, only a script with a story to which they are all sticking.

That's why they are a douche.

Give your examples in the above format. There may be a rare front page post if we get a few good ones.

Post by **TheCatt** » Tue Jul 20, 2010 2:37 pm

Word: "so-called"

Usage: The Wake County school board has voted in favor of "so-called" neighborhood schools that critics say will resegregate schools.

Reason that user is a douche: The schools are neighborhood schools. They are schools in neighborhoods, attended by kids in the neighborhood, supported by people who live in the neighborhood. "so-called" is trying to convert a fact into an opinion.

Post by **GORDON** » Tue Jul 20, 2010 4:29 pm

This one might be obvious, but

Word: "Racist."

Usage: "They only oppose that person/policy/idea because they are racists."

Reason the user is a douche: The person doesn't like anyone having an opinion contrary his own, therefor anyone who disagrees with anything is a racist. No qualification is ever needed to use that moniker. If you ask, you are a racist, too.

Malcolm · Post by **Malcolm** » Tue Jul 20, 2010 8:19 pm

Word: proactive

Usage: "We need to be more proactive in our approach to this solving this problem."

Reason the user is a douche: There's "active" and "passive." Fucking pick one & don't add unnecessary prefixes to existing words to make them sound new or dynamic.

Edited By Malcolm on 1279671670

Malcolm · Post by **Malcolm** » Tue Jul 20, 2010 8:27 pm

Word: compromise

Usage: "We need to reach a compromise on this contentious issue."

Reason the user is a douche: Compromise is a code word for "let's piss off everyone approximately equally so it looks fair." Compromise involves rolling small bits of god-awfulness from diametrically opposed ideas into one large, incoherent ball of bureaucratic mediocrity.

Post by **GORDON** » Tue Jul 20, 2010 8:47 pm

Word: "Obstructionist."

Usage: "Obstructionist Republicans in Congress are making it hard to do good work."

Reason the user is a douche: There is damned near a super majority of Democrats in Congress at the moment, and if they all thought any particular thing was a good idea then there wouldn't be shit the minority Republicans could do about it. Referring to a minority voting block as the reason you can't get anything done is an attempt to lay blame where it isn't deserved, instead of having integrity and just owning it.

Also, see "Racists," above.

Edited By GORDON on 1279673297

Post by **TheCatt** » Tue Jul 20, 2010 9:38 pm

Revision to compromise:

"{blanks} need to compromise."

Translation: {blanks} need to abandon their shit and come over to our side. Again, because we never compromise.

Post by **thibodeaux** » Thu Jul 22, 2010 6:00 pm

Somebody do "progressive" for me. I'm too lazy.

Malcolm · Post by **Malcolm** » Fri Jul 23, 2010 10:38 am

thibodeaux wrote:Somebody do "progressive" for me. I'm too lazy.

Word: progressive

Usage: "The tax should be more progressive so the rich pay their fair share."

Reason the user is a douche: Going against something's that's "progressive" is obviously going against "progress," you obstructionist, racist bastard, you. Learn to proactively compromise.

unkbill · Post by **unkbill** » Fri Jul 23, 2010 6:19 pm

"I promise" out of the mouth of any person running for any office. You guys fill in the blanks.

Edited By unkbill on 1279923650

Post by **thibodeaux** » Mon Jul 26, 2010 9:53 pm

How about a phrase? I really hate it when somebody says "Change is good."

Post by **GORDON** » Tue Jul 27, 2010 12:15 am

Well go for it.

The Japanese have a saying, "Consistency is power."

Edited By GORDON on 1280204189

unkbill · Post by **unkbill** » Tue Jul 27, 2010 7:12 am

thibodeaux wrote:How about a phrase? I really hate it when somebody says "Change is good."

I don't know antime I get change back from a dollar I feel lucky they didn't take the whole thing.

Post by **GORDON** » Wed Sep 15, 2010 1:53 pm

GORDON wrote:This one might be obvious, but

Word: "Racist."

Usage: "They only oppose that person/policy/idea because they are racists."

Reason the user is a douche: The person doesn't like anyone having an opinion contrary his own, therefor anyone who disagrees with anything is a racist. No qualification is ever needed to use that moniker. If you ask, you are a racist, too.

This is probably still going on the front page, so I'm going to add to this:

Unless the speaker specifically says, "I hate (race)," or, "All (race) people are THIS WAY," then it isn't a racist statement.

'The poor' are not a race.

A religion is not a race.

'Southerners' are not a race.

Thinking the President of the United States is incompetent has nothing to do with the color of his skin.

Post by **TPRJones** » Wed Sep 15, 2010 5:25 pm

Other things that are not a race: nationalities, unions, political parties, age groups, geographical regions, cities, and neighborhoods.

Post by **thibodeaux** » Tue Nov 02, 2010 8:03 am

"Holistic." Does this even mean anything?

Also, I hate it when people end their emails with "any thoughts?"

God, I really hate that.

Edited By thibodeaux on 1288699419

Post by **Cakedaddy** » Tue Nov 02, 2010 11:51 am

Why do you hate "any thoughts?"?

Malcolm · Post by **Malcolm** » Tue Nov 02, 2010 12:46 pm

thibodeaux wrote:"Holistic." Does this even mean anything?

The best way to define that word is to read this.

Post by **thibodeaux** » Tue Nov 02, 2010 12:53 pm

Cakedaddy wrote:Why do you hate "any thoughts?"?

Well, it's an awful cliche, so that's one strike.

But mainly because it's such a puss-out. Most of the time, it really means: "Can you help me, please?" Or: "I've noticed something possibly wrong with your code."

Malcolm · Post by **Malcolm** » Tue Nov 02, 2010 12:59 pm

I'll chime in with "it is what it is." As in, "Well that feature really just is what it is." As in, "Yeah, we know it ought to do correctly, but fuck you, this is the best you're getting."