Welcome to Thunderdome

Posted: **Thu Aug 29, 2013 12:31 pm**

A flick produced (I think) by Tarentino and directed by a dude named RZA. RZA also put himself in the movie, as a hero. Shocka.

The movie itself... interesting. Basically an old school kung fu flick set in the 1800's in China. Russel Crowe is in it. Also some Chinese people. There is splatter gore, ala Kill Bill, and some caracatured racism (Russel Crowe saying "Me Rikey!" to a Chinese chick instead of "likey" instead of "like." Just feels strange in 2013..... which I am pretty sure was exactly the point). Anyway, the movie itself feels like an old school kung fu flick, whoch is great... I grew up watching those.

The movie falls down with RZA. He just absolutely is shit as an actor. Russel Crowe's acting skills make RZA literally look like a retarded monkey with brain damage when he tries to "act," and you can tell RZA is trying really hard to "act." Literally. Not just a retarded monkey, but yes, one with severe brain damage that just this side of "while there is not enough brain damage to kill you, there is just enough that you still retain enough neuron synapse to speak, but not enough to correctly display any type of emotion appropriate to the circumstance." I really can't say enough bad things about RZA's acting skills. I do not possess Malcolm's gift for verbalizing disdain. But as far as I am concerned, Robert Fitzgerald Diggs ruined this movie. I hate him and hope that I never see or hear of anything connected to him again.

Edited By GORDON on 1377795228

Posted: **Thu Aug 29, 2013 12:41 pm**

On second look, I don't think Tarentino was involved... i don't know why I thought he was. But I couldn't find his name on the wikipedia entry.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Man_with_the_Iron_Fists

Posted: **Thu Aug 29, 2013 2:54 pm**

It only has a 5.4 rating on IMDB. Not good...

Posted: **Thu Aug 29, 2013 3:14 pm**

GORDON wrote:On second look, I don't think Tarentino was involved... i don't know why I thought he was. But I couldn't find his name on the wikipedia entry.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Man_with_the_Iron_Fists

I remember seeing previews with the line "Quentin Tarentino presents..."

Posted: **Thu Aug 29, 2013 3:18 pm**

Malcolm wrote:
GORDON wrote:On second look, I don't think Tarentino was involved... i don't know why I thought he was. But I couldn't find his name on the wikipedia entry.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Man_with_the_Iron_Fists
I remember seeing previews with the line "Quentin Tarentino presents..."

Ditto

Posted: **Thu Aug 29, 2013 3:31 pm**

During the development process, Tarantino agreed to lend his name to the film with a "presented by" credit.[31]

What does that mean?

Posted: **Thu Aug 29, 2013 3:33 pm**

TheCatt wrote:
During the development process, Tarantino agreed to lend his name to the film with a "presented by" credit.[31]
What does that mean?

At a point in the development process, Quentin Tarantino, whom Roth has worked with, agreed to present the film — something that wouldn't have happened, Roth said, “if the writing hadn’t been up to a certain level.”

Posted: **Thu Aug 29, 2013 4:18 pm**

Apparently he shoukd have seen the acting first.

But still, wtf does presented by mean? Is it just fame whoring on someones name?

Posted: **Thu Aug 29, 2013 4:21 pm**

TheCatt wrote:Apparently he shoukd have seen the acting first.

But still, wtf does presented by mean? Is it just fame whoring on someones name?

I think he literally gave RZA permission to use his name in front of the word "presents."

Posted: **Thu Oct 31, 2013 5:56 pm**

Finally got around to watching it off DVR:

Taken as a whole, mostly decent. Standard kung fu flick, although it's rather obvious this is a screenplay written by a genre fan rather than a genre veteran. In a few places, like the fight scenes, that's awesome because I don't have to deal with the Asian Fight Style Fetish Syndrome which permeates many period examples. There's no bullshit about how someone's monkey style is superior/inferior to mantis style to Xaolin kung fu to some made up style, etc. So bonus there. On the flip side, there are a couple cast members that just stick out like sore thumbs. I can't believe I'm not including Russel Crowe in that list. The other two non-Asians, the RZA and Bautista ... just what the fuck? The RZA looks like he got really high one day and bet one of his buddies he couldn't write, direct, and star in his own karate movie. He's fucking awful. As for Bautista ... was he cheapest dude they could find? Did the RZA owe him money? Was he more expensive than say Tony Jaa, who at least has something of a history in kung fu films? More expensive than any random Asian stunt man that could speak passable English?

As for the fights themselves, I felt they left something to be desired. A few of my concerns ...

- The lame-o way a couple of characters manage to ice each other simultaneously in the climactic battle at the end.

- The battle with the Gemini Killers (who were completely thrown away).

- The huge chasm of disbelief I must overcome as the RZA boxes and defeats opponents while resembling a fifth rate, past his prime Buster Douglas having painful muscle spasms.

- The Legolas-wannabe prick who runs around with the blowgun denying the epic killing strokes the choreography screams for in favour of bad CGI poison and death poses that make rhythmic gymnastics routines look positively heterosexual.

They make up for shitty primetime fight choreography with copious bloodletting but I can't help feel that in the hands of a competent director, a team of writers not assembling from former Wu-Tang members, and a decent lead, this could have been a considerably better flick. Not Crouching Tiger... or anything, but something a notch above the amateur filmmaker/frat boy-esque feel some of the dialog and scenes betray.

Welcome to Thunderdome

The Man with the Iron Fists