Welcome to Thunderdome

I guess this is the story of Anakin's apprentice from the Clone Wars cartoon, and to a lesser extent an episode or 2 of The Mandalorian.

I watched the first double episode.

It seems like about 90% of the back story is dependent on you having watched at least one of the star wars cartoon shows. I have not. I had no idea who were the people, who they were talking about, who they were mourning, and what was driving the plot. I have no prior investment in these characters and so far it doesn't seem like they're going to make me feel anything for them, now. They're just there alluding to storylines I've never seen. Who gives a fuck.

And I'll just fucking say this..... they're looking for a map to find where a person is hiding out. So they go find the 2000 year old map in the 2000 year old temple, because that's the map to the person who is like 50 years old. What.

And the actors seem to be having a contest to see who can deliver their lines the slowest.

And one of the main characters is an annoying as fuck, "I don't follow anyone's orders but my own" even when she's fucking over her friends for HA HA LAUGHS. And I think she's supposed to be liked. I don't like her and hope she dies.

Very bad first episode impression.

Yep, Rolling Stone agrees that if you hadn't watched Rebels, you'll be lost.

https://www.rollingstone.com/tv-movies/ ... 234809424/

I didn't even know it existed aside from this thread.

The second episode was more of the same, and they're leaning in to that WILD GRRRRRL character, so I'm done. Who gives a fuck.

Episode 5 to premiere in theaters.

However, all tickets were already given away as free passes, and there's no showing in your area anyway. (probably)

So, I guess something really big is going to happen? Based on their ratings, nobody cares.

I went back to this because I heard Thrawn was back, and I had finsihed Man in the High Castle.

Here's my impression of this show:

Two hot women with history are talking to a room with other people in it, and they share a private look.... slooow 5 count.... with a small smile on their lips.

They're from a cartoon but they totally banged.

And they look like live-action cartoons. The one female alien has this headgear with steampunk-style goggles no matter what situation she is in, and she never uses the goggles, and is never in a situation where she would need the goggles. It just looks dumb and takes me out of the story because all I can do is wonder if she even takes those goggles off to sleep or have sex with the other woman off camera.

And the conversations happen soooo slooooow. And there's letting a scene breathe, and then there's taking a good 30 seconds to pan the camera around two people about to have a light saber fight. It's like they had 19 minutes of show they needed to stretch out to 35 minute episodes. This is every episode. I think I heard the showrunner, and director, is the same guy who made the cartoons (which is why all the necessary backstory in the show happened in the cartoon). I don't know how the cartoon was, but his live-action directing sensibilities suck.

Here's how this guy writes Thrawn, godlike military strategist:

"I have anticipated this action, and I have a plan to defeat you." Then he loses. "This is an acceptable outcome, I'm calling it a win."

At least 4 times.

GORDON wrote: ↑Thu Oct 05, 2023 7:47 pm Here's how this guy writes Thrawn, godlike military strategist:

"I have anticipated this action, and I have a plan to defeat you." Then he loses. "This is an acceptable outcome, I'm calling it a win."

At least 4 times.

Critical Drinker said this same thing, a few days after I did.

I was going to say something along the lines of "The interesting thing about writing characters is that if you want them to be brilliant, the author needs to be brilliant first, and that can be a challenging puzzle. Timothy Zahn did it well. The guy who wrote these episodes was not up to the task."

Drinker sums that up as, "Thrawn was written by a stupid person who thinks this is what smart people are like." I agree.

FYI, pretty sure this has been cancelled due to terrible ratings.