In the Blood - At 'Dem Flicks with Malcolm

As long as we recognize Lucas is washed up and most TV sucks, we'll all get along fine.
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Malcolm
Posts: 32040
Joined: Fri May 21, 2004 1:04 pm
Location: Minneapolis

Post by Malcolm »

Synopsis:
It's kind of like Taken, except with the genders reversed, and with a way, way, reduced budget.

Review:
Gina Carano's
Image
... husband gets himself kidnapped and she goes Liam Neeson on a bunch of dudes on a Carribbean island. I mean "Hollywood Carribbean" because there are Puerto Ricans (Luis Guzman), Mexicans (Danny Trejo), Brazilians, Spaniards, and other assorted folks who are all supposed to be native islanders that are really just trying to pass off a tan as an ethnicity. Oh yeah, gangsters have bought off everyone on the island, including the cops. She dispatches, beats the shit out of, or tortures everyone up to the top gangster lieutenant responsible. That's the end of the second act.

The third act really doesn't need to happen but I guess the screenwriters needed to squeeze out an extra twenty minutes and make Danny Trejo's cameo a bit more meaningful.

An an aside, Gina starts out the movie in a wedding dress. Looks fucking hideous. She gets more attractive the more she brutalizes the stuntmen.

Verdict:
More mindless action, but keep it in the back of your mind when your wife complains there aren't enough strong female leads in punch 'em ups anymore.
Diogenes of Sinope: "It is not that I am mad, it is only that my head is different from yours."
Arnold Judas Rimmer, BSC, SSC: "Better dead than smeg."
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