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Posted: Wed Oct 21, 2015 1:03 am
by Malcolm
Alhazad wrote:Malcolm wrote:Have you considered lying? "You didn't just get up, you've been up for three hours and you already had cereal."
You suggest this as if contradicting GORDO weren't her resting state.
Mentally outwitting a demento is doable after you tune into their frequency. Shit, it's an activity that encourages your brain to ward off plaque. You just need to have some very grey ethics.
Posted: Wed Oct 21, 2015 1:07 am
by GORDON
I just finished reading every comment on that page I linked.
Old people seem to have several common traits:
1. They become extremely selfish
2. They all get dementia
3. They seem to pick the pushover to take care of them, then proceed to exploit
4. Extended family, once she is tucked away, disappear to keep from getting asked for help.
Yep, I guess I'm not alone.
Posted: Wed Oct 21, 2015 10:50 am
by Malcolm
That's really only two things because after the second, accountability goes out the window. Hell, even one of them's a shitty personality flaw.
Posted: Sun Oct 25, 2015 9:39 pm
by GORDON
Lately I have been noticing a problem with cats getting up on tables, again. I didn't think anything of it except to lament the fact that here was yet another aspect of my life that seems to be out of control and slipping further into chaos. I can't even have well-behaved cats in the house that can learn to stay off tables.
Well, this morning my wife walked into my mother-in-law's room to get into that bathroom.... and there sits my MIL, smile on her face, watching the kitten sitting all-4-paws on her TV tray, drinking milk out of her cereal bowl.
Dawn says she was startled. And this is not a repeat from a few months ago:
MIL: Is this ok?
Dawn: NO. WE HAVE TOLD YOU OVER AND OVER TO NOT FEED THE CATS FROM YOUR TRAY, AND DON'T FEED THEM PEOPLE-FOOD.
MIL: Well I have had a lot of cats and they were all fine giving them cereal milk.
Dawn: THAT DOES NOT MATTER AT ALL. WE ASKED YOU TO NOT DO IT, AND HERE YOU ARE LETTING THE KITTEN SIT RIGHT ON YOUR TRAY EATING MILK.
MIL: No she wasn't, you're wrong, she wasn't eating it. She was licking it.
Yes, she called him a 'she.' I can't help but remember when she first moved in, and her cat would jump on tables like she owned them, and my MIL would say, "Well she never did that at my house."
Dementia is one thing, but her knowing our wishes and just not caring...
Serenity now.
Posted: Sun Oct 25, 2015 10:14 pm
by TheCatt
I bet Malcolm could take care of it for the right $
Posted: Sun Oct 25, 2015 11:12 pm
by Malcolm
Cats require training. Stop trying to indirectly influence it by arguing with the insane.
Posted: Mon Oct 26, 2015 2:03 am
by GORDON
The problem being, most of the people in the household train the cats to stay off tables with negative reinforcement. When no one is looking, the MIL rewards them for getting up on tables. I am not sure what the solution to this is.
Earlier today, everyone but the MIL were driving somewhere and we saw a billboard, something about, "End elder abuse." The wife and I saw it, and I said, "Yeah, I'm not saying elder abuse is right, but I understand it, now." We both laughed.
Posted: Mon Oct 26, 2015 6:35 am
by Alhazad
Start telling her that if the cats keep misbehaving you'll have to get rid of them. You found a lever that works on her fear when you rescued her and her cat from that "awful" (great) pet-free nursing home and you should be low-key using it in every believable way you can.
And if you want to re-train the cats, a thing to do would be to get a motion sensor that barks at them when they jump up where they shouldn't be. If they fear the tables instead of you, they'll be hesitant to jump up even when she's around and you're not.
If they make them with collar sensors, you could even look for an ultrasonic one outside of human hearing and hide it in your MIL's TV tray. That'd be funny.
Posted: Mon Oct 26, 2015 10:24 am
by Malcolm
If they fear the tables instead of you, they'll be hesitant to jump up even when she's around and you're not.
Indeed. Exploit stupidity.
Edited By Malcolm on 1445869509
Posted: Wed Oct 28, 2015 9:47 pm
by GORDON
GORDON wrote:Just to add a little seasoning to this big pile of shit, her son, who lived with her from the ages of 40 to 50 until she moved into my house, and did nothing to help her out, sniffed around asking for money yesterday. He has neither called her, nor answered our calls, since she moved in with me. He is going to be a problem.
Back again tonight needing more money.
Posted: Wed Oct 28, 2015 10:03 pm
by Malcolm
Tell him to get a job.
Posted: Thu Oct 29, 2015 12:27 am
by Alhazad
GORDON wrote:more
Does that mean you gave him money in the first place? Because that would be foolish.
Posted: Thu Oct 29, 2015 7:57 am
by GORDON
Alhazad wrote:GORDON wrote:more
Does that mean you gave him money in the first place? Because that would be foolish.
*I* didn't give him shit.
He brought her a sugary sweet potato pie and whipped cream, to butter her up. Obviously he doesn't have facebook.
Posted: Thu Oct 29, 2015 8:30 am
by Leisher
Did you allow her to have it? Did you correct him on what a huge mistake it was to bring something like that to her?
Posted: Thu Oct 29, 2015 8:39 am
by TheCatt
I miss the days when you could have just shot him.
Posted: Thu Oct 29, 2015 11:26 am
by TPRJones
Leisher wrote:Did you allow her to have it? Did you correct him on what a huge mistake it was to bring something like that to her?
Did you ask him why he's trying to murder her? Is he hoping for an inheritance?
Edited By TPRJones on 1446132426
Posted: Thu Oct 29, 2015 1:08 pm
by GORDON
Leisher wrote:Did you allow her to have it? Did you correct him on what a huge mistake it was to bring something like that to her?
I exited myself from the situation as soon as he came over. My wife knows what's happening, and she really laid into him, made sure he knows she is giving him what money she had for christmas presents, that she wasn't a bottomless money hole, and all of our costs went up by her being here and he's basically taking money from us after he already got a free ride from her for the last 15 years. My wife is a loan collector at a bank, a good one, and she can be a real bitch because she doesn't have any tact, either.
I didn't know about the pie until later after he left when I looked into the fridge, and I never ate those so I had to look to see if there was sugar... something like 54g in a serving, so YEAH. I think I need to just put it in the trash when she isn't looking.
I suspect he will be less of a problem from here on out.... but I told my wife to keep an eye on his mortgage because he got the damned thing at half price.... as his inheritance... and if he is going to default on it, I want to snatch it up before it gets to that point. Instant 50k of equity.
Posted: Sat Nov 07, 2015 10:41 pm
by GORDON
She went through a couple days of "You aren't my boss" and ate whatever the hell she wanted when we weren't around, and for the last 3 days she has been sick and shitting herself, and now her sleeping schedule is getting all turned around again, and she can't even acknowledge my "I FUCKING TOLD YOU SO" because she denies all the previous, "Don't eat that, you are going to make yourself sick" conversations ever happened.
I'm not saying elder abuse isn't wrong, but I am saying that I understand it.
Posted: Sat Nov 07, 2015 10:58 pm
by Malcolm
Dude, lock your shit down. It's the only way to be sure.
Posted: Sun Nov 08, 2015 5:56 am
by Alhazad
Agree with Mal. You wouldn't expect self-control from a toddler, so why are you expecting it from a toddler? That's the real question.